Friendships and expectations

When talking to past schoolies, they always mention ‘spending time with their friends’ as their favourite thing about Schoolies. A way to value your friendships is to make sure you’re communicating with each other in the lead up to, and during Schoolies.

Make sure you’ve chatted about each other’s expectations, agree on some ground rules before you arrive and make sure you cover off your plans for the week.

Expectations

You’ve been looking forward to Schoolies all year and you’re sure it’s going to be the best week of your life. Sometimes though, when you’ve been looking forward to something for a long time, expectations can be too high and you may end up disappointed.

Friends first

Finishing school is a big deal and it is immediately followed by the excitement of Schoolies. We've all heard about friends who have had a bust-up at Schoolies. Make sure you stay friends by following these easy tips:

• agree on the ground rules with your friends before you arrive. Discuss what behaviour you will and won't tolerate, strategies for safety and your plans for the week.
• if you're concerned about a friend's choices or behaviour, try to talk to them about what's worrying you. It's never a good idea to talk about them behind their back.
• if tension starts to build, remember these are your friends and they've shared important parts of your life, so give them some space.

Managing conflict

Try to resolve conflict by talking it over when you're both calm and able to focus on the problem (oh, and sober):

• tell your friend how you feel, without blaming or accusing them.
• allow your friend to tell their side of the story. Listen and try to understand their point of view without interrupting them.
• violence is never acceptable. A fight at Schoolies could ruin a long-term friendship. Stay calm and go for a walk to cool down if you feel like things could get out of hand.

No matter what happens, make sure you and your friends are safe at all times. Even if you're arguing, you'll be safer together than going off on your own.

Peer group pressure

A couple of little tips to have in your back pocket if your friends are pressuring you to do something you don’t want to do during Schoolies:

• talk to your friends before you're there about your expectations for the week
• put some plans in place for the next day and communicate you don't want them ruined
• use your parents as an excuse
• move away from the situation
• use humour to deflect the pressure
• real friends should be respectful that everyone has different ideas on how they wish to celebrate.

And remember, always stay true to yourself. Stick to your choices and what's right for you.

Feeling homesick

For some of you, Schoolies may be the first time you‘ve been away from home. It’s also often a time of significant change and uncertainty. All of these feelings, combined with exhaustion after partying for a few days, may have you longing for your own bed and a familiar face. Know that it is okay to feel this way but more importantly, know that it’s also okay to go home early.

Tips to cope with homesickness:

• set a regular time to call home - not only will this keep the parentals happy but will also provide you with something to look forward to every day
• have a night off partying with your mates - a good night’s sleep coupled with a good meal can often be the best medicine
• stay active and busy – visit the beach, theme parks or shopping centres during the day
• see if someone from home can drop off a home cooked meal – or even pop home for one
• know that you don’t have to stay – you can chose to go home at any time.